Real Heroes Don't Always Make the Magazine Covers

Over the past several weeks, Davidson Day School has celebrated student achievement during our first trimester with assemblies to recognize excellence in academics and athletics. We also celebrated Students of Character – students who have made our School better by helping others, leading by example and inspiring us with their integrity. At our Upper School Honors Assembly, Marketing Creative Director and Photography Teacher, Paul Cotter, was asked to deliver a keynote address. His words were so inspiring to our students and the adults in our community, I wanted to dedicate my blog to sharing his insights with all of you.

Real Heroes Don’t Always Make the Magazine Covers

By Paul Cotter
Keynote Speech
Upper School Honors Assembly
Wednesday, Dec. 1, 2010

In 1997, two prominent women died within a week of each other. One was Mother Teresa of Calcutta; the other was Princess Diana of Wales. One was a woman who devoted her life to caring for the sick, the poor and the hungry. The other was a woman who did charity work, but was adored primarily as a member of royalty – someone who enjoyed a jet set lifestyle and attracted the attention of paparazzi worldwide.

When they died, who do you think was placed in the media spotlight? Was it the woman who chose to live in poverty and who won the Nobel Peace Prize? Or the woman who was dating the playboy son of a rich tycoon at the time of her death? Not surprisingly, Mother Teresa’s story was buried in the inside pages, while stories about Princess Di were splashed across our newspapers and television screens for weeks and months after her death.

I believe this says a lot about us: our culture … our values … the kind of people we admire and place on pedestals.

Think about the men and women we call our “heroes” today. What faces appear on the posters and magazine covers? In most cases, they’re celebrities – movie stars, singers, athletes. These are people with extraordinary talent. And in some cases, they’re also extraordinary human beings leading exemplary lives. But in many cases, they lead lives that are in direct conflict with the values we supposedly hold dear, and they’re not the kind of people we aspire to be. In fact, they’re just the opposite.

I’m guilty of this myself. If you walk into my classroom, you’ll see posters of Miles Davis and John Lennon, two of my “heroes”. These men were creative geniuses. But they were also heroin users and they could be ruthless to the people around them. So why don’t I have a poster of Mother Teresa on my wall instead? Good question.

Perhaps we should ask ourselves: What is it that we really admire in a person? What qualities do we look for in a friend? My guess is that it’s not the best singing voice or the prettiest face or the fastest time in the 40-yard dash. The qualities that come to mind are honesty … loyalty … respect … integrity … kindness … unselfishness. These are the qualities we look for in a friend. These are the qualities we really admire.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful to honor these qualities and put these people on a pedestal?

I’m happy to say, that’s why we’re here today. At this special Honors Assembly, we’re here to honor Davidson Day School students who have achieved academic success and have shown exceptional character.

For the Students of Character award, the teachers were asked to nominate students in each grade 5 through 12. In Upper School, the teachers received the following request from our division head, Michael Smith:

“Would you please give some careful thought to a student with whom you have had some personal observation of his or her character? Remember that this can take on an array of definitions: from a student who selflessly gives his or her time to assist another student, someone you observe picking up trash unsolicited, someone who thanks you at the end of every class, etc.”

You’ll note that these acts of character did not have to be large, grand-scale acts. They could be little things. As Mother Teresa said, “We can do no great things; only small things with great love.”

We gave careful consideration to the request put before us. We nominated students who we felt demonstrated exemplary character in the classroom or in their outside activities. We then voted and chose one student from each grade. Now we’re gathered here to celebrate their character, along with those students who’ve distinguished themselves academically.

Before we meet the honorees, it’s worthwhile to ask: Why is Davidson Day School placing these students on a pedestal? Why are we having this special assembly today? Remember the Honor Code that we signed at the start of the year. Every student, every teacher, every staff member – all of us – we all signed a code pledging:

“As a member of the Davidson Day School community, I pledge to selflessly value the needs of others and act for the good of all. I will treat others with the highest level of respect. I will not cheat, lie, steal, plagiarize or engage in activities that can hurt myself or others …”

By being here today, we’re proving that this pledge means something, that it’s not just empty words.

I’d like to leave you with a story and a quote.

When I played high school football, our varsity coach gave us a pep talk before a big game against our archrivals. He told us that when he played in high school, he was a linebacker squaring off against the star running back on the other team. On the first three plays, the other team’s running back dashed off runs for big gains. “On the next play,” our coach told us, “I’ll be darned if that kid’s fingers didn’t find their way under my cleats and he left the game with a broken hand.” The lesson, he told us, is that there’s always a way to win if you want it badly enough.

I was disgusted. I lost all respect for my coach that day. And I’m proud to say, that coach would never be allowed through the doors at Davidson Day School.

The other day, one of my colleagues told me he’d read an interesting statistic. When surveyed, the majority of people – I believe it was 53% -- said that an action is NOT wrong if you can get away with it. Lying, cheating, stealing … they’re okay as long as you don’t get caught. That’s what 53% of the people believe.

I’m proud to say: 53% of the people don’t belong at Davidson Day.

Here’s the bottom line. The world can be a bad place, a tough place, an unfair place. But it can also be a better place. And we can make it that way through our actions, even the smallest demonstrations of character. When Mother Teresa received her Nobel Peace Prize, someone asked her, “What can I do to promote world peace?” She answered simply, “Go home and love your family.’

I’ll leave you now with one of the most inspirational things I’ve ever read. It was written by Anne Frank on July 15, 1944, shortly before she was captured by the Nazis and sent to a concentration camp where she would die – freezing, sick and starving. She’d been in hiding for two years and was well aware of the atrocities around her. And yet she wrote:

“It’s really a wonder that I haven’t dropped all my ideals, because they seem so absurd and impossible to carry out. Yet I keep them, because in spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart.”

I believe, too, that people are really good at heart – especially the students of character being honored today. They make me proud to be part of Davidson Day School.

Thank you.

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